Trump to Auction Remaining Cabinet Positions on eBay

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President-elect Trump has decided to auction off his remaining cabinet positions and ambassadorships on eBay to raise money for the Trump Foundation. Eric Trump, who is a real whiz with eBay, loaded all the 420 remaining positions on eBay for his Dad. Bidding has been brisk, with the Tahitian ambassadorship holding the highest bid so far at $899,000.00.

Trump spokesperson, Anita Borshun, said, “Mr. Trump has grown bored with the whole process, and he’s already given positions to all his major donors that wanted one, so now he figures why not raise some quick cash. He had no idea there were so many cushy jobs to give away.”

Top Democrats immediately expressed outrage. Nancy Pelosi (Dem. - CA) said, “This is outrageous! Cabinet positions should be doled out to top donors and lobbyists like they always have. This blatant disregard for the standard protocol of political corruption is an affront to our corporatocracy.” 

Justice officials in the Obama administration have said they can find nothing in the Constitution about eBay, so they assume it is legal. President Obama remarked, “I always assumed he’d give them out on a reality show.”